Is Summer Already Bleeding Your Bank Account?
- Vignesh Sivagnanam
- Jun 16
- 4 min read
How to Set Boundaries With Your Spending (and Family!)
It’s not just the cost of petrol or a few extra meals out. It’s that quiet feeling — mid-July, staring at your bank app — wondering how things have unravelled again.
You knew summer would be busy. You expected the kids to want more. You even planned ahead this year.
But it still feels like money is flying out the door faster than you can keep up.
If you’re a parent who’s earning well but still feels stretched every summer, you’re not imagining it. You’re just carrying the weight of family life — and that weight doesn’t go on holiday.
When Every Summer Feels Like You’re Treading Water
Here’s what I hear from clients every year:
“I thought we were doing fine — until I checked the account.”
“It’s not the big stuff. It’s all the little bits adding up.”
“I hate feeling like I’m the only one paying attention.”
And behind all of that? A parent who’s trying to do the right thing. A parent who wants to say yes, create memories, and not feel like the killjoy.
But also… a parent who’s tired. Of being the one doing the emotional labour. Of being the one who feels guilty for saying no. Of watching the money vanish and not knowing where it’s gone.
If this hits home, keep reading. You’re not the problem — but you might be trying to hold it all alone.
Why High Earners Still Feel the Stretch
You might be earning £100k+ as a household. You’re not living hand-to-mouth. You’ve done well.
But here’s what often gets missed:
When you’re the one thinking about the money, it feels heavier
When plans are spontaneous or unspoken, you pick up the slack
When extended family expect things, you rarely push back
When your partner isn’t as focused, the responsibility defaults to you
And that feeling of “we’re fine, but also… we’re not”? That’s the disconnect I hear most often.
This isn’t about being tight. It’s about finding a way to spend that doesn’t leave you feeling quietly resentful, out of control, or stuck cleaning up in September.
What You Actually Want
To enjoy summer without stress
To say yes because it feels right — not because you feel bad
To protect what matters (family, connection, fun)
And to stop feeling like you’re the only one trying to keep things on track
That’s where boundaries come in.
Not as a hard stop, but as a way of putting your needs back into the equation.
5 Boundaries to Keep You Sane (and Still Say Yes to Fun)
1. Anchor Around One Big Thing
Decide what matters most this summer. A beach trip. A cousin sleepover. A BBQ where you don’t scrimp on the food.
Pick it, own it, and let that be the memory-maker.
Everything else? Nice if it happens. But not essential. You don’t have to keep proving yourself with plans.
2. Say No With Care (Not Apology)
Let this be the summer you say:
“We’re keeping it really simple this year.”
And leave it at that.
You don’t need to explain your finances, or defend your choices. You just need to hold the line for your family — and your sanity.
3. Don’t Be the Default Payer
If you’re usually the one grabbing the snacks, covering the entry fees, or paying upfront “to be easy” — it’s time to pause.
You can say:
“Let’s split it in advance — that way it’s all sorted.”
You’re not being awkward. You’re being clear. Clarity makes room for calm.
4. Set Up a Summer Pot
Decide what you’re comfortable spending across the holidays. Move it into a separate account or savings pot.
Now you’ve got something concrete to check in with — instead of vague guilt every time you tap your card.
5. Have the Mid-Holiday Reset
Pick a moment in late July. Just ten quiet minutes to look through your spending so far.
Ask:
Are we happy with where we’ve said yes?
Do we need to rein it in?
Is there anything we still want to prioritise?
This isn’t about beating yourself up. It’s about avoiding that early September feeling of “we did loads, but I still feel drained.”
What Coaching Clients Say
“We’re earning well, but I kept thinking — why does it still feel so tight? Vig helped us make a plan that actually reflected our life. We enjoy spending again — without the guilt.”
🔍 Q: How can UK parents enjoy summer without blowing their budget?
A: Set clear boundaries, pick one highlight to focus on, and give yourself a spending pot so you’re not second-guessing every "yes". Planning doesn’t remove the fun — it protects it.
Want This Summer to Feel Different?
This isn’t about cutting back. It’s about cutting through the chaos so you can enjoy what matters most.
If summer spending always feels like it runs away from you — and you’re tired of figuring it out alone — let's have a chat.
We’ll talk about:
What summer’s looked like so far
What you want it to feel like instead
And whether my Insight Session could help you build a calm, clear plan that supports your whole family
Written by Vignesh Sivagnanam — a UK-based money coach helping high-earning professionals and parents feel calm, confident and in control of their finances.
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